Season III Episode XIX “What Becomes of the Broken-Hearted” 

 Welcome back you little liars! It’s a new Tuesday and that means a new Pretty Little Liars! But here’s a quick recap – Aria was eye fucking Ezra’s little brother, Hanna was shoving on her overalls and hopping out to the country, Emily was busy jumping into the book of Forgotten Memories, and Spencer was hellbent on finding out if her relationship with Toby was going to work after all.

This week we start off with Hanna, Emily, and Aria discussing the strange activities of the fourth liar while Aria rallies for a new school uniform look.

The girls then see Spencer talking to the nerdy/mini-Jason guy and he tells her that unfortunately she’s been kicked off the Geek Squad. Emily goes to comfort her but Spencer storms off before putting on her stunnah shades which have a scrawled message from A:

“You rat out T, I take down one of your three.”

Cue creepy theme music.

Hanna and Aria are discussing Spencer eating her elbows and whether Caleb’s uncle is his father while Emily actually works!

Ezra’s mom starts to ring Aria’s phone. Aria shakily answers and covers for an undercover Wes.

Emily finally calls Ke$ha by her name! It’s CeCe. Emily walks up to her and asks CeCe about Wilden. CeCe denies the fact that Wilden had sexual relations with Ali and we skip to a very depressed looking Spencer.

While Spencer shreds every vegetable in her blender, Mini-Jason Guy walks up to her residence and knocks on the back door because that’s normal in Rosewood. And in an instant…I swear I’m already shipping them. Anyway, they discuss the idea of Spencer rejoining the team. Then Spencer becomes some kind of perv and starts a game of strip History Question.

Hanna, sans overalls, visits Jamie who greets her with a smile. Hanna sticks it to him and Jamie admits that he is Caleb’s father. They then begin to argue over what’s best for Caleb and I just don’t see the resemblance between the two boys at all.

Spencer and Mini-Jason are playing the strip game when we see really how gigantic Mini-Jason’s muscles are compared to that tiny head. Just as Spencer’s removing her bra, Emily arrives. Mini-Jason runs out the door, ruining the party.

Emily begins to bring up Toby and Spencer is on the verge of revealing that Toby is A. She fails,however and leaves a flabbergasted Emily to eat Lucky Leon’s cupcakes alone.

Aria’s helping Wes pack up because he’s on the run from the Evil Mrs. Fitzgerald when she presents the idea of him joining the Rosewood scene.

CeCe calls up and asks Aria for some help in shooting for her boutique. While Aria answers yes, Hanna and Caleb start up another argument. Ashley stomps in as the two end the dispute with Caleb slamming the back door.

Jason’s sitting in the same circle that was in the same classroom during Truth Up Day. Emily walks in and tries to clean up Spencer’s mess. Jason reveals he left Wilden a message and that Ali has a picture on a boat. Emily asks to see it and the scene ends.

Spencer is sitting in the kitchen, back in her depressive state when the wonderful,beautiful, Wren Kingston arrives. My TV is officially on fire and we notice he’s gotten a tan and a lovely new haircut. He reveals that Mona gave him a call and because he’s not just a doctor but also a licensed psychiatrist, he decided it was best to talk to her. Spencer plots a night out for them and runs up stairs to put a bra on.

Caleb, with a terrible slick backed do, approaches Hanna and the two make up.

Commercial Break!

Bam! We’re back with a romantic tune blaring out of the Brew’s speakers. While the two discuss Uncle Jamie’s absence, another wall seems to develop between the two.

CeCe, who’s apparently Aria’s new best friend, teases her about Aria’s feelings for the two brothers. Little Bro returns with his English accent shining through and the scene changes.

Uncle Jamie finally arrives to talk to a ugly haired Caleb. Jamie sits down and conversation begins.

Emily and Jason arrives at the old DiLaurentis house to find tons of the wine bottles Cameraman A bought last week. Right on cue, A delivers a message but I couldn’t read it so deal with that suckas.

Commercial Break!

As Wren and Spencer drive through the woods of Rosewood, Aria takes pictures of Buddha while Wes knocks bottle of wine onto the carpet. Aria heads right to the rescue but somehow makes the stain twice as large in the process.

Emily and Jason walk into somewhere that looks pretty much like the police station if it was filled with storage boxes. As they discuss Ali and Mona, they start to look through every box.

Hanna arrives home and finally brings up our favorite preacher: Pastor Ted. Hanna wants Jamie to work on the church in town and Ashley wonders if its for the best.

Emily finds the collage and they find pictures of CeCe, Jason, and Ali together. Jason heads into flashback mode and we see him stumbling all over the place before finally drinking out of the hose. He sees Melissa and CeCe discussing something with harsh voices before he passes out in a lawn chair.

Emily snaps him out of it and the two continue to stare at the collage.

Spencer and Wren arrive at some rundown shack-like restaurant and Spencer makes an excuse to sneak into a side room. This room also seems to be where the Geek Squad competition is. Deflecting Mini-Jason, she makes a beeline for Mona and starts making double sided statements. Spencer then threatens to expose Mona’s complete case study online. Mona mentions Toby but Spencer hisses retorts causing Mona to counter so quickly that it sends Spencer into a rage. She begins to choke Mona who enters fetal position. Wren, the amazing and strong British hunk that he is, pulls Spencer back and out of the room.

Commercial Break!

Aria and Wes discuss the fact that he’s homeless for the night before Aria offers her couch to him (wink,wink). CeCe calls Aria and claims her car is towed all the while sitting in the red beauty.

Hanna’s lighting candles around the church and goes to sit next to Caleb. They share a tender moment and seal it with a kiss before Ashley emerges and announces that Pastor Ted has offered Jamie the job. Hanna, not bothering to blow out the candles, leaves a five dollar note with dice on it in the donations box.

Emily and Jason enter the elevator and it immediately begins to shake. They begin to call for help while Wren covers for Spencer.

Aria’s pulling sheets out for Wes while they discuss books and poetry. They are standing awfully close to each other during the whole exchange and they both lean in for a kiss before Aria backs the hell up and tells him that they can’t do anything.

Jason and Emily used their combined strength to open the doors. Jason then encourages Emily to jump back into the storage room. As soon as she jumps out, Jason pretty much falls to his death and we all shed some tears because he was hott and had a banging body.

Commercial Break!

And we return with Jamie the pizza guy at the Marin residence and pulling the money Hanna put in the church out of his wallet. However, Hanna’s soon distracted as all the girls receive SOS messages.

Jason appears shirtless…and with a neck brace. He then reveals that someone wants him killed before she goes to get more water. All the girls arrive and Spencer apologizes for being a bitch. A nurse interrupts and announces that Jason has disappeared. The girls huddle around in that way they do when they A) receive a group message from A, B) find a clue, or C) experience a major plot twist.

Cameraman A is up to his naughty tricks by sticking pictures of all the girls on bottles and playing spin the bottle with another A. They take Spencer’s top off and pour her into two glasses.

Well, tonight’s episode was rather boring until the second half. I can’t wait for Spencer’s secret about Toby to finally be revealed because I feel like it’s holding the show back at the moment. I didn’t think anybody won the War of Witty Phrases this week so the title remains unclaimed as of now. Well, anyway, I’m off to look up pictures of Jason’s hot body and eat some ice cream.  

Tune in next week for a whole new recap, bitches!

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